me on composing stuff .. need your opinion ..
Lots of words, melodies, and guitar riffs are infesting my brain lately. Just a couple of weeks ago, I've started composing songs. "Songs" cause I've already done 2. Ok. Ok. One and a half, the first one is only half-done. Anyway, as I've said, I've already started composing songs. At first, I thought it was as easy as thinking of words, adding melody to it, add the instruments, and voila! But, it wasn't as simple as that. Writing the words is easy, but writing stuff with, if not lots of, sense is hard. There really are lots of words playing in my mind right now, I'm not quite sure how I could come up with something meaningful with them.
I just remembered the first and last poem I've submitted in Poetry.com way way back. I've submitted a poem hoping for a shot at a prize, a thousand dollars if I remember it correctly. They sent me a mail that my poem actually was included in the Semi-finals. After that, none. I'm not really sure if they actually included it in the book they published as they said. Lots of typos by the way. Hehe. I wasn't really expecting something from the poem anyway, but I was glad when they sent me the mail. I know I'm not as talented in writing as these people, but heck, that's worth a shot back then.
Going back to me "composing" songs. I want to ask for your opinion, comment, suggestion, whatever on the song I've written. Criticisms are also welcome. C'mon! Let's be honest here.
I'll post the recording once polishing and actual recording is done (calling the band members, especially the vox). I don't want to post the rough recording with me singing, God didn't gave me that talent. Poor Me. Hehe. Here it goes:
Verse 1:
I, I am looking at you
As you walked out the door.
You left me on the floor,
And the life I thought was our own.
Verse 2:
I made you my everything
When you gave your self to me.
But now you're gone, I'm all alone,
My life is yet to be freed.
Chorus:
It's time to put the past behind
And that includes all my memories of you.
I'm going to build the life I once had
Just before I met you.
Verse 3:
How will I ever forget
The warmth of your embrace.
Sleepless nights, I didn't regret
But today my heart just says.
Repeat Chorus
Instrumental
Bridge:
I don't need your lame excuses
For leaving me behind
There's no reason for me to feel you
Cause right now I'm feeling numb inside.
Repeat Chorus
I just remembered the first and last poem I've submitted in Poetry.com way way back. I've submitted a poem hoping for a shot at a prize, a thousand dollars if I remember it correctly. They sent me a mail that my poem actually was included in the Semi-finals. After that, none. I'm not really sure if they actually included it in the book they published as they said. Lots of typos by the way. Hehe. I wasn't really expecting something from the poem anyway, but I was glad when they sent me the mail. I know I'm not as talented in writing as these people, but heck, that's worth a shot back then.
Going back to me "composing" songs. I want to ask for your opinion, comment, suggestion, whatever on the song I've written. Criticisms are also welcome. C'mon! Let's be honest here.
I'll post the recording once polishing and actual recording is done (calling the band members, especially the vox). I don't want to post the rough recording with me singing, God didn't gave me that talent. Poor Me. Hehe. Here it goes:
Verse 1:
I, I am looking at you
As you walked out the door.
You left me on the floor,
And the life I thought was our own.
Verse 2:
I made you my everything
When you gave your self to me.
But now you're gone, I'm all alone,
My life is yet to be freed.
Chorus:
It's time to put the past behind
And that includes all my memories of you.
I'm going to build the life I once had
Just before I met you.
Verse 3:
How will I ever forget
The warmth of your embrace.
Sleepless nights, I didn't regret
But today my heart just says.
Repeat Chorus
Instrumental
Bridge:
I don't need your lame excuses
For leaving me behind
There's no reason for me to feel you
Cause right now I'm feeling numb inside.
Repeat Chorus
5 comments:
nice lyrics you got there. I haven't heard your tune yet, so I can't really say, pero your words are there na. I have written a few songs of mine din back in College. I stopped when I decided to go full time in writing.
Just go and a let those creative juices flow. Writing songs and poetry is a really good outlet, moreso a hobby.
Good luck, and looking forward for more words from you :)
and oh yeah, thanks for the props! though, i don't regard myself as a good writer. Ron is though... :)
keep you posted for any updates and once we finish recording the stuff. Thanks for checking.
Ganda ng poem pala... akalain mong pwedeng may plot twist ang tula. :-)
The lyrics are intriguing... it sounds like a breakup song, but depende na siguro sa music ang magiging emotional tone niya.... it could be bitter, angry, or even a little kawawa pathetic, depending on how it will be sung... hahaha challenge!
In my mind, I'm accompanying it with fast strumming on an acoustic guitar, so that's probably why I'm reading it that way.
Ayan, bitin tuloy ako!
@buddee: bolero!
@Ron:
don't make me post my rough record .. I don't want my name and pride to be ruined .. haha
probably a little of all the emotions you've said plus the feeling of the need to move on ..
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